THE LAST 10 THINGS.....

The Last 10 Things Any Woman Would Ever Say:
10. Could our relationship be more physical? I'm tired of just being friends. 9. Go ahead, leave the seat up, I don't mind. 8. I think hairy butts are really sexy. 7. Hey, get a whiff of that one. 6. Please don't throw that old T-shirt away, the holes in the armpit are just too cute. 5. This diamond is way too big. 4. Oral sex makes you happy...... you don't have to say anything else. 3. Wow, it is 14 inches! 2. Does this make my butt look too small? 1. I'm wrong, you must be right again.

The Last 10 Things Any Man Would Ever Say:
10. I think Barry Manilow is one cool mother. 9. While I'm up, can I get you a beer? 8. I think hairy butts are really sexy. 7. Her breasts are just too big. 6. Sometimes I just want to be held. 5. That chick on Murder She Wrote gives me a woody. 4. Sure I'd love to wear a condom. 3. We haven't been to the mall for ages, let's go shopping and I can hold your purse. 2. Screw Monday Night Football, let's watch Melrose Place. 1. I think we're lost, we better pull over and ask directions.

The Last 10 Things Someone in an Alternate Lifestyle Would Ever Say:
10. Sure my parents know and they couldn't be happier. 9. I went to the Melissa Etheridge concert just for the music. 8. Priscilla, Queen of the Desert....never heard of it. 7. That Martina Navratolova sure is sexy. 6. Go both ways? No I've never heard that expression. 5. I think leotards are always too tight. 4. K.D. Lang looks nothing like my brother. 3. Poor Liberace....what victim of the dreaded Watermelon Diet is next. 2. Long time companion....that could mean anything. 1. Someone has to say it....The Village People made damn great albums.