Fun E Humor - Joke and Humour Archive

AUTOMATED PHONE ATTENDANT FROM HELL

<1> Thank You for calling. This automated attendant will help navigate you through our system. If you are an impatient caller, please press # now. Everyone else, press 2.	<2-ABC> To continue, press 5 and listen. If the instructions at 5 would cause you to press 9, ignore them and press 8. But if they would cause you to press 8, ignore them and press 9.	<3-DEF> Press the button directly to the left of the one you pressed just before this one.
<4-GHI> If at any time you are instructed to press *, do not. Instead, press the button at the top of the column you are in at that time. To continue, press 9.	<5-JKL> If the last button you pressed before the 5 was in this column, press 9 now. If not, press 8 now.	<6.-MNO>If the sum of the last three buttons you pressed before the 6 is 18, press 3 now. If the sum is 20, press 1 now. If it's neither, press 8 now,
<7-PRS> If the letters on the last four buttons you pressed before the 7 could spell "melt", press 4 now. If they could spell "clue", press 6 now. If neither, press 8 now.	<8-TUV> If you have pressed five buttons or fewer, press 3 now. Six buttons or more, press 7 now.	<9-WXY> To continue, press 6 and listen. If the instructions at 6 would cause you to press 1, ignore them and press #. But if they would cause you to press 3, press *.
*<>** Sorry! You have failed to properly navigate the phone system. Thank You for calling. --CLICK--	<0-OPER> Hello, may I help you? --CUSTOMER REQUEST-- I'm sorry, you just missed them. Could you call back? --CLICK--	<#> Press * now.
Answer = 1-2-5-8-3-7-6-3-5-8-7-4-9-6-#-3-0