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United States of America

White House

1600 Pennsylvania Avenue

Washington D.C.

(800) 555-1212

January 7, 1991

President Hussein

Directory of Military and Civilian Operations

Bagdad, Iraq

My Dearest President Hussein:

I hope this letter reaches you in the best of health. We think of you often, so I decided to write you and let you know that I am doing well and Barb's sledding accident was not serious.

I understand we don't see eye to eye on this Kuwait thing. I am sure after I explain my feelings on the matter you will undoubtedly see my point.

I guess I should get straight to the meat of the matter and say... READ MY LIPS!!! Get the fuck out of Kuwait, you rag-head son-of-a-camel-humping-bitch, before I turn my Air Force loose and make a multi-national parking lot out of your piece of camel shit country and then send the fuckin' Army and Marines in to paint the fuckin' lines on it. I won't even need my Navy, because by that time your sorry ass will be sitting next to your fuckin' Allah and you won't be concerned about too much of anything anymore. Now, do you think you understand my meaning?

Well, Barb is calling me for dinner. I'll close now. Give my best to all the other little fuckin' rag-heads. Keep in touch.

All My Love,


P.S. - I've been told your camel is pregnant again. I guess you still got it!! Congratulations!!

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