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1- "Use" a toilet on display in a plumbers shop - complain vigorously about the lack of paper and privacy, Ask why the flush doesn't work.
2- Return to the shop a few minutes later and say "well - I know they want to make it realistic - but that shit looks a tad too real for me"
3- On public transport - when leaving your seat - grab the woman on the seat in front's breast - when she is expecting an apology for your clumsiness say "oooh - nice hooters" and honk the other one...
4- Bring some empty sweet papers to "rustle" during the quiet bit of a film...
5- Cross the road in front of a car, change your mind 3/4 of the way over and turn back. (Particularly good if the driver has honked his horn or shown signs of impatience).
6- Knock some magazines off the shelf in a newsagent and blame it on some children who are in the store - this works best if you know the owner of the shop is a bit of a bastard with kids!
7- If you are in a shop and a child is being told he can't have any chocolate, secretly put a bar (or several) in the trolley and wait for the argument at the checkout counter.
8- Spend the day in a hi-fi store listening to cd's on various systems and then say "thanks for the fun" and leave without making a purchase.
9 - Bring some fresh cream along to a "pick your own" fruit farm - have lunch there. Return to the "weighing" place with cream over your mouth and empty fruit bowls.
10- When the hairdresser shows you your haircut in the mirror and asks if it's ok - say no and demand a full refund.
11- Recite crossword clues out (very) loud in public, complain if anyone offers advice on the answers.
12- Play a noisy puzzle / electronic game in a library.
13- Follow the suggestions made on a list like this.
14- In a posh restaurant - try to persuade all the diners to take part in a group purity test.
15- Sing songs out of tune and with incorrect lyrics (preferably accompanying a loud walkman).

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