AUDI
Accelerates Under Demonic Influence
Always Unsafe Designs Implemented
All Un-informed Drivers Insulted
All Unnecessary Devices Installed
BMW
Big Money Works
Bought My Wife
Brutal Money Waster
BUICK
Big Ugly Indestructable Car Killer
CHEVROLET
Can Hear Every Valve Rap On Long Extended Trips
Cheap, Hardly Efficient, Virtually Runs On Luck Every Time
DODGE
Damn Old Dirty Gas Eater
Drips Oil, Drops Grease Everywhere
FORD
Fix Or Repair Daily
Found On Road, Dead
Fast Only Rolling Downhill
F**king Old Rebuilt Dodge
(sent in by Bob Pierce of "The Daily Vault" Album Reviews)
GM
General Maintenance
GMC
Garage Man's Companion
HONDA
Had One Never Did Again
Happy Owners Never Drive Anything else.
HYUNDAI
Hope You Understand Nothing's Driveable And Inexpensive?
MAZDA
Most Always Zipping Dangerously Along
OLDSMOBILE
Old Ladies Driving Slowly Make Others Behind Infuriatingly Late Every .... day.
Overpriced, Leisurely Driven Sedan Made Of Buick's Irregular Leftover Equipment
SAAB
Send Another Automobile Back
TOYOTA
Too Often Yankees Overprice This Auto
VOLVO
Very Odd Looking Vehicular Object
VW
Virtually Worthless
AIRLINES
AA
Abort! Abort!
Always Awful
Alitalia
Always Late In Transit, Always Late In Arrival
American
A Miracle Each Rider Is Currently Alive Now
AWA
Always Wasting Assets
BA
Bloody Awful
BEA
Better Eat Afterwards
Delta
Directed Everybody's Luggage To Atlanta
Don't Every Leave The Airport
Northwest
Nobody Out Ranks This Horrid, Worthless, Excruciatingly Sluggish Transport
Olympic
Onassis Likes Your Money Paid In Cash
Pan Am
Pilots Are Not A Must
Poor Airline Needs Any Money
Qantas
Queasy and Nauseous, Tired And Sick
Sabena
Such A Bad Experience - Never Again
SAHSA
Stay At Home, Stay Alive
TWA
That Was Accidental
Today's Worst Airline
United
Usually Not Inclined To Eliminate Disasters
USAir (used to be Allegheny Airlines):
Unfortunately Still Allegheny In Reality
Underwater seats available in rear
Uta
Unlikely To Arrive
Unable To Ascend
