Search This Site:


Boss near?
Leave quick!
panicbut.gif (970 bytes)

      HUMOR MENU
  Random Humor Link
  Online & Internet
  Microsoft & Bill Gates
  Computers & Technology
  Men, Women & Sex
  Stupid People / Crazy Ads
  Life, Living & Location
  Music, Radio, TV & Movies
  Kids, Pets & Animals
  Government & Politics
  Work & Corporate
  Education & Language
  Holiday, Season, Religion
  Travel, Cars & Driving
  Eating, Drinking & Drugs
  One-liners, Quotes, Etc.
  Fun & Funny Things To Do
  All Other / Misc. Humor
  Joke-A-Minute / Archives
  Image / Photo Archives
  FunEHumor Home Page

      SITE MENU
  Get Free Email Updates
  Recommend us to others +
  Visitor Testimonials
  Take Our Site Survey +
  Help Support This Site
  Advertise on FunEHumor
  Send Us Email
  News & Announcements
  Last Mailing List Update +
  Funny Disclaimer
  Privacy Policy
  (+) - opens in new window


Please Show Your Support For This Site!!     (Click this text for details)

---

[an error occurred while processing this directive]

STOCK MARKET LINGO

BULL MARKET -- A random market movement causing an investor to mistake himself for a financial genius.

BEAR MARKET -- A 6 to 18-month period when the kids get no allowance, the wife gets no jewelry, and the husband gets no sex.

MOMENTUM INVESTING -- The fine art of buying high and selling low.

VALUE INVESTING -- The art of buying low and selling lower.

P/E RATIO -- The percentage of investors wetting their pants as the market keeps crashing.

BROKER -- What my broker has made me.

STANDARD &POOR -- Your life in a nutshell.

STOCK ANALYST -- Idiot who just downgraded your stock.

STOCK SPLIT -- When your ex-wife and her lawyer split your assets equally between themselves.

FINANCIAL PLANNER -- A guy who actually remembers his wallet when he runs to the 7-11 for toilet paper and cigarettes.

MARKET CORRECTION -- The day after you buy stocks.

CASH FLOW -- The movement your money makes as it disappears down the toilet.

YAHOO -- What you yell after selling it to some poor sucker for $240 per share.

WINDOWS 2000 -- What you jump out of when you're the sucker that bought Yahoo @ $240 per share.

INSTITUTIONAL INVESTOR -- Past year investor who's now locked up in a nuthouse.

PROFIT -- Religious guy who talks to God.

[an error occurred while processing this directive]

Join | Remove

New Humor List
Daily Joke List
Weekly Joke List
    

Is this page funny?
Send it to someone!
 

 

 

 


In Association with Amazon.com
Copyright 1998-2007   FunEHumor.com    |    http:\\www.funehumor.com    |     contactus@funehumor.com
The displaying of copyright information on this site is designed to refer to the FunEHumor name, the FunEHumor.com web site address and all elements of the web site itself, including, but not limited to our logos, the site design, layout and overall appearance, and the use of our name publicly or for profit. We are in no way attempting to imply that we have any copyrights or trademarks on or for any of the humorous content/material or humor content/material names located within our web site.