HUMOR MENU
Random Humor Link
Online & Internet
Microsoft & Bill Gates
Computers & Technology
Men, Women & Sex
Stupid People / Crazy Ads
Life, Living & Location
Music, Radio, TV & Movies
Kids, Pets & Animals
Government & Politics
Work & Corporate
Education & Language
Holiday, Season, Religion
Travel, Cars & Driving
Eating, Drinking & Drugs
One-liners, Quotes, Etc.
Fun & Funny Things To Do
All Other / Misc. Humor
Joke-A-Minute / Archives
Image / Photo Archives
FunEHumor Home Page
SITE MENU
Get Free Email Updates
Recommend us to others +
Visitor Testimonials
Take Our Site Survey +
Help Support This Site
Advertise on FunEHumor
Send Us Email
News & Announcements
Last Mailing List Update +
Funny Disclaimer
Privacy Policy
(+) - opens in new window | | |
Please Show Your Support For This Site!! (Click this text for details)
|
--- |
[an error occurred while processing this directive]
DEAR DR. LAURA
On her radio show recently, Dr Laura Schlesinger said that, as an
observant Orthodox Jew, homosexuality is an abomination according
to Leviticus 18:22, and cannot be condoned under any circumstance.
The following response is an open letter to Dr. Laura, penned
by a US resident, which was posted on the Internet. It's funny, as well
as informative:
Dear Dr. Laura:
Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God's Law. I
have learned a great deal from your show, and try to share that knowledge
with as many people as I can. When someone tries to defend the homosexual
lifestyle, for example, I simply remind them that Leviticus 18:22 clearly
states it to be an abomination. ...End of debate. I do need some advice
from you, however, regarding some other elements of God's Law and how to
follow them.
1. When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I
know it creates a pleasing odor for the Lord - Lev.1:9. The problem is my
neighbors. They claim the odor is not pleasing to them. Should I smite
them?
2. I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned
in Exodus 21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price
for her?
3. I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she
is in her period of menstrual uncleanliness - Lev.15: 19-24. The problem is
how do I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offense.
4.
Lev. 25:44 states that I may indeed possess slaves, both male and female,
provided they are purchased from neighboring nations. A friend of mine
claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you clarify?
Why can't I own Canadians?
5. I have a neighbor who insists on working
on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2. The passage clearly states he should be put to
death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself?
6. A friend of
mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an abomination - Lev.
11:10, it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality. I don't agree. Can you
settle this? Are there 'degrees' of abomination?
7. Lev. 21:20 states
that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a defect in my sight. I
have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does my vision have to be 20/20,
or is there some wiggle-room here?
8. Most of my male friends get their
hair trimmed, including the hair around their temples, even though this is
expressly forbidden by Lev.19:27. How should they die?
9. I know
from Lev. 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me unclean, but
may I still play football if I wear gloves?
10. My uncle has a farm. He
violates Lev. 19:19 by planting two different crops in the same field, as
does his wife by wearing garments made of two different kinds of thread
(cotton/polyester blend). He also tends to curse and blaspheme a lot. Is it
really necessary that we go to all the trouble of getting the whole town
together to stone them? - Lev.24:10-16. Couldn't we just burn them to death
at a private family affair like we do with people who sleep with their
in-laws? (Lev. 20:14)
I know you have studied these things extensively
and thus enjoy considerable expertise in such matters, so I am confident you
can help. Thank you again for reminding us that God's word is eternal and
unchanging.
Your adoring fan,
(you may have seen a similar speech given on an episode of The West
Wing, NBC television - this version turned up on the internet. I have
removed the person's name at the end since I could not confirm it's
validity.)
|
[an error occurred while processing this directive] | | |
|
|
|
| Copyright 1998-2007 |
|
FunEHumor.com
| http:\\www.funehumor.com |
contactus@funehumor.com
The displaying of copyright information on this site is designed to refer to the FunEHumor name, the FunEHumor.com web site address and all elements of the web site itself, including, but not limited to our logos, the site design, layout and overall appearance, and the use of our name publicly or for profit. We are in no way attempting to imply that we have any copyrights or trademarks on or for any of the humorous content/material or humor content/material names located within our web site. |
|
|
|
|
|
